Steve Figueroa Photography

Strange and Unnecessary California Laws

12/18/2015

 
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As I've travelled this country, I wondered what laws I was actively violating while passing through. So, I plan on covering every state I blew through at some point. 

However, when I searched, I found that California had some odd laws on the books that seemed even strange coming from Florida. So, without further ado, let's start with the list of my favorite strange laws that will crack you up and probably aid in your street cred as a potential hardened criminal.
  • Assembly Bill No. 2078: It is Illegal to have sexual activity with detained persons. Now, this should go without saying, but this law seems to go into some extreme detail about what government officials cannot do with/to detained individuals. Items include, sodomy (uh...duh), and rubbing boobs (well that's no fun.) Either, way, it begs the question: Do we really need a law that itemizes what government employees can and cannot do to detained people? And what the hell happened to warrant a completely different set of rules and regs regarding this? Hmm. 
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  • Section 8.05.020 Permit – Norco County - $100 Permit is required to keep a rhinoceros. From what I read, this law actually covers all kinds of exotic animals, but it seems something may have happened for them to target the adorable and light footed rhino! Could you imagine having dinner with the family and hear the blood curdling scream of this f*cking thing smashing into cars in your neighborhood? Who has the money to feed a rhino? That has to be the WORST pet idea ever? "Honey, will you take Spike for a walk at the park, the neighbor's car was buried in shit the last time."

​​Section 8.05.020 Permit – Definition
Except as provided in this chapter, no person shall possess, keep, maintain or have in his possession or under his control, within the city, any elephant, bear, hippopotamus, rhinoceros, lion, tiger, leopard, panther, ocelot, lynx, cougar, wolf, alligator, fox, raccoon, coyote, monkey, ape, chimpanzee, birds of prey, poisonous reptile, other dangerous or carnivorous wild animal, other vicious or dangerous domesticated animal or any other animal of wild or vicious propensities, without first applying to and receiving a permit from the city of Norco to do so.
(Ord. 581, Sec. 1 (part), 1988)
  • ​Section 8-410: Disturbing animals in Fresno Parks - No person shall hunt, pursue, annoy, throw stones or missiles at, or molest or disturb in any way, any animal, bird or reptile within the confines of any park. (Orig. Ord. 1076).  So what you're saying is Fresno had a real problem with people were openly harassing and molesting animals? And who in the hell is launching missiles at reptiles? How big are these freaking things?
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  • Code 1959, 4237.1 - Walnut, CA. It is illegal for a man to dress up like a woman...UNLESS PRIOR PERMISSION HAS BEEN GAINED FROM THE SHERIFF! Kaitlyn Jenner will have some issues out here.  
    17-31 Male dressing as female. No man or boy shall dress as a girl or woman without a permit from the sheriff, except for the purpose of amusement, show or drama. Now, can you imagine going to the Sheriff's office and asking for the form to file for permission from the Sheriff? Man, that would be an awkward meeting. 
  •  ​In Chico, detonating a nuclear device incurs a $500 fine. Sure, I think $500 should just about cover the total annihilation of life for a 50 square mile area. No biggie. Now, this fine covers, development, possession, or TESTING. Who was the genius behind this one? Was the City Comptroller consulted at all on this one? 
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  • No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 mph. This is not a joke. You cannot "Ghost Ride your whip" above 60 mph. Hell, if you could do that above 4 mph, you have my respect and admiration. And the attention of every football scout this side of the Mississippi. I am curious as to what in god's name occurred for this law to be written into existence? Are they preparing for autonomous driving cars. I'm intrigued. 

    Well, I hope you enjoyed this list and if you want to read about other strange California Laws, check out the original article here. 
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