Steve Figueroa Photography

Challenge Epidemic: Is This What We Have Become? 

1/27/2016

 
Siemny Kim - Photos from Siemny Kim's post on Facebook - SteveFig.comSkylar Fish Photo - from Siemny Kim's post on Facebook
Over the last few years, the internet has given birth to these so-called "Challenges" by which you are dared to do something utterly and completely ridiculous on video and risk injury or death in the process. We minorities will decry "oh, white people" but we have had a few of our own lowbrow moments and participated in large scale to the proliferation of this stupidity. 

Remember the Cinnamon Challege? How about that fun Fire Challenge?

One of the latest additions to this f*ckery is the Duct Tape Challenge. To participate, simply ask a friend to duct tape you to a wall, chair, bed, etc. Then, time how long it takes you to escape. Yes, folks. Your kids are doing this. Youtube has thousands of videos of people attempting this, many being slightly injured in the process.

One boy gaining a ton of unwanted attention is Skylar Fish. The 14-year old Frankenstein-esque kid pictured to the left. In attempting to free himself from his silvery binds, he cracked his head open on concrete, suffered a brain aneurysm, is blind in one eye and now permanently disfigured.

Who takes the blame in this case? His mother? His Friends? God? Personally, I blame society. We have created an environment where kids can't be kids anymore. Kids are not going through the same phases we did.. They are skipping straight to shenanigans, by passing much of the life experiences they should have before making it to that point. Anyone who plays Call-of-Duty can attest that little kids are foulmouthed little racist dickbags. Youtube has tons of recordings of these kids mouthing off and it's baffling what comes out of their mouths.

They aren't running around outside getting hurt riding bicycles like I did on many...many occasions. Now, we have these tiny, jobless, uneducated, desensitized creatures, who can't fend for themselves. I rarely see kids out doing anything. I used to see kids everywhere having a blast, riding bikes, playing games, and just living. The only time they seem to go out now is to capture themselves doing blatantly idiotic things on video and labeling it a challenge?

I'd love to see challenges like "Volunteer at a local Food Bank" or "Do something nice for a complete stranger!" How about "Make A new friend by 3pm," that sounds pretty awesome. It sad and hilarious that the film Idiocracy seemed to predict this almost a decade ago. 

​​For a complete list of idiotic challenges, click here: http://www.listchallenges.com/youtube-challenges

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Masterbation Booth Aims To Relief Work Stress in Manhattan

1/16/2016

 
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New York is a bizarre, nutjob infested, smelly, impossible to navigate, small country with the power to create and destroy industries. One ballsy company, Hot Octopuss, decided they had a great solution for the city's masterbation epidemic - a free spooge booth.

It seems New York has been plagued with public dolphic floggers over the last few years. Speculation for the issue seems to be daily stress associated with city life. 

I grew up in New York and I can tell you I never had the urge - even during the insatiable peak of my pubescence - to do the 5 Knuckle Shuffle in front of people. As a somewhat functional adult, I still have no urge to mangle the midget with an audience. It's crazy talk. 

Years ago, 42nd Street and Times Square was known as "The Deuce", a 2 block strip of oddities. You could find anything and everything there. Strip clubs, hookers, adult toy shops with jerk booths inside, and more. Mayor Rudy Giuliani made it his mission to clean up that area and he did it.

Hot Octopuss seems to think the new business model of 42nd Street leaves these guys no alternative but to Wax the Buick on train or city bus. Time will only tell if this Guy-Fi Booth is successful. Only sporting a curtain for privacy, it features a laptop, and hopefully a roll of paper towels.

For more information, read the full article from the Daily News http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/manhattan/manhattan-guyfi-booth-men-relieve-stress-article-1.2499002: 

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Movie Review: Bone Tomahawk

1/9/2016

 
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Every once in awhile, a film is released that reinvigorates the senses. Hiding a raw, almost all-too-real grit that movies lack these days - where little special effects are used and incredibly intense acting are the driving force. Other films I place in this category are "There Will Be Blood" and "No Country for Old Men" are the latest two I would stack up next to this new classic. Director S. Craig Sahler somehow pulled it off.

Bordering on Horror, Suspense, Drama, and Sci Fi, "Bone Tomahawk" has it all. There's even a couple of laughs to be found. However, it is overshadowed by the sheer brutality brought on by the blood thirsty cannibals that become the focal point of what could have went in any classic western direction.

The acting is brilliant. Stoic. Ballsy. With an all-star cast that features Kurt Russell in the lead as the take-no-crap small town Sheriff. He runs a tight ship but appreciates his trusty sidekick played by the iconic Richard Jenkins (Step Brothers) really shows his acting chops in his role as Chicory - the town buffoon full of humble nobility and a devoted friendship to the Sheriff. It seems crazy to see him in this role in a film that could have easily casted him in the lead. 

Matthew Fox really shines as Brooder, the douchey antagonist with good taste in clothes and the best damn horse in town. Not a role you're used to seeing him pull off. But here he shines. As does Patrick Wilson who shares the main character duties with Jenkins, Russell, and Fox.

Final Thoughts: I see Richard Jenkins winning a SAG award for really absorbing his character. I see an Oscar Nod for Editing, Music, and probably Make-Up. What movie has ONE song? None. It's brilliant, brutal, and bloody. Good god, there is no preparing yourself for what you will see. 

"Blood Tomahawk" is streaming on Amazon Prime. If you don't have prime, it's on sale on DVD/Blu-Ray. Click on the link below and save a few bucks. 

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Product Review: Silicone Shisha Bowl

1/4/2016

 
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If you know me, you know I am a bit of a Hookah fan. I do not endorse smoking cigarettes or other things because that's just not my thing. It stinks. It makes everything stink.

But, hookah seems to be the lesser of those evils. It smells great, tastes delicious, and a great way for friends to gather and have a great time. Young and old, everyone who goes to a decent Hookah Lounge has a great time. 

Over the years, I have visited dozens of hookah lounges, tested all kinds of various shishas, and I feel like I've reached the point where I can definitively and effectively judge products available in this market.

One of the newer items to hit the market is the Silicone Shisha Bowl. This item is still catching steam with home users, but bar owners are shying away from it as may not have proven itself in a continual usage environment. 

I ordered this particular model from Amazon and I love it!

Pros: Available in Multiple Colors. It's easy to clean, you don't have to overpack it, and you don't need a grommet. It'll fit onto any of my hookah stems - Khalil Mamoon, Mini, etc.

Cons: It's hard to get your foil to fit tight as the silicone flexes under pressure. My solution? MORE FOIL. Honestly, It's not as smooth as a tangiers style. But I think the benefits balance with these drawbacks.

I definitely recommend adding one of these to your collection. Thanks for reading and if you want to order one, they are on sale for $11.99 with free shipping on Amazon. Click on the link provided and help support my website!


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